I recall a little-known past incident in my childhood: After I finished primary school, I was an ignorant child and no one asked me to go to middle school. When I was about 13 or 14 years old, I had not heard from my father for several years, so I wondered if he was well.

In order to avoid working as a part-time worker in the cafeteria owned by my elder brother-in-law, where there was no salary, no days off (I had to work on Sundays), and no future, I chose to go on a journey alone to find my father.

Our rubber plantation is on the bank of the 北加 river, and my father should be there. I was only a four or five-year-old child when I left my hometown, but now I have to find my way back home alone? It seems really incredible now.

At that time, there was no direct land connection to 北加 (in the Terengganu state of Malaysia). You had to take a boat from the sea to Kuantan, and then take a bus to 北加. 北加 is a small town next to the mouth of the 北加 town by the river.

One night, my second brother-in-law took me on a small boat parked at the red light pier. The small boat took me to the offshore ship, which was a cargo ship. Although the future is uncertain and helpless, the poor but brave young man feels uneasy but does not understand the fear. There was no food or drink on the boat, but the weather was calm. The other guests and I spent a sleepless night on the deck of the boat.

The boat arrived at the pier in Kuantan in the early morning of the next day. Although I didn’t know how far away I was, it was exciting! I was going back to the familiar place where I had many childhood memories! Under the guidance of kind-hearted people, I got on the bus home. It was a long and slow journey from Kuantan to 北加, and the time passed in anticipation but uneasiness!

In the evening, we finally arrived in 北加. It seemed to be just a small declining village. I was unfamiliar with the place and could not recall the scenes of my childhood. Fortunately, I found my "brother-in-law". This was the only person my mother ordered me to rely on, and he really missed my old friendship and allowed me to have dinner and stay at home.

After breakfast the next morning, we still couldn’t see the appearance of the small village, so we took a motorboat and went up the Beijia River. This was the last part of the trip, and there were only woods and no people on both sides of the river. The boat travels again and again, and as time goes by, it reaches the end.

It was a village on the bank of the river. Later I found out that it was a concentration camp, where all the residents on both sides of the 北加 river lived.

Fortunately, my father is still alive, but things have changed. I feel lost and melancholy! I can't go back to the past!